Guitar

“Helping ugly people have sex since 1464”
“If” by Bread, “Tears in Heaven” by Eric Clapton and a half-ass version of “Last Kiss” by Pearl Jam, make up about all I can manage to scratch out of my $350 Partie classical guitar made in Quebec and purchased in 2002.
Beside loving the sound of classical and electrical guitars and wanting to further my musical skills, there was another ulterior motive behind the purchase of this instrument.
My experiences at summer camps during my visits to Spain in 2002 and 2003 and the movie “Tao of Steve” confirmed to me the two sided facet of this well known musical instrument. The obvious one is to produce music with it. The second, and the one that convinced me to buy it, is to use the guitar as a clever and subtle device to charm young pretty girls. The effectiveness of the second use was clearly confirmed to me by my friend Zigor who in several occasions applied his years of guitar skills to successfully swoon young female victims.
Of course, for the pick-up girl use of the guitar to work, one must be able to play the guitar properly. I dare to say that the effectiveness of the pick-up girl side of the guitar is directly proportional to the expertise of the guitarist. In other words, if you suck at playing it like I do, don’t expect chics to fall in love with you anytime soon. However, if you play well, you probably know that your music talent will not always be a guarantee to score either, but it can help especially with the younger and more naive victims.
Having said this, I must remind myself that to truly master playing an instrument, you must first truly love the instrument and then rewards will come on their own.

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Gracias a el poder encantador de la guitarra hasta feos como este ha triunfado con mujeres.
Thanks to the charming power of the guitar, even ugly people like this man have been successful with women.


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